i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Randomize
