so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
