don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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