a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize