Where did you get a picture of my penis
id be glad to
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Randomize