im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
