Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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