you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
