Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Floor bacon is actually really good
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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