chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize