Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
