Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize