Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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