Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
