I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
If I die, sorry about rent.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
