Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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