Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
