soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
