Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Randomize
