I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize