Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
