you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
