Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
