it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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