OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
