i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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