Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize