..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I supernannyed him into submission
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
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