when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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