oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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