brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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