It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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