Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
