try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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