I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
