dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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