You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
