party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize
