4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
