the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
