Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I think I won the penis lottery.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
