Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
tell me about the fingering
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