I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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