TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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