Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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