Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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