69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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