Heybabeimwearingurpanties
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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