Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
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