Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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