Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
