Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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